Every time I take a step away from writing and come back I feel like I'm starting this blog all over again, which is great in terms of motivation but not so good for post consistency, but let's roll with it.

I've been sitting exams since I was 13/14 years old, so I've seen my fair share of exam seasons, and this past month has been the worst by far. I love learning more than anything in the world, but eventually there comes a point (especially in a law degree) where I'm learning names two hours before an exam and the test is really just a memory game - which quite frankly, is shit. It's demeaning. I know it's my own fault for doing extra credits this semester, and that my drive is dwindling with every passing exam, but wow, I've never felt so uninspired. That might be to do with physical/mental/emotional exhaustion, and the effects of maybe 3-4 hours sleep a night for the past month and a half - but it's time to start fresh. Exams are over, and I'm excited to have a breath of literal fresh air.

So naturally, less than 24 hours from that last exam, I'm back on my laptop - but this time I'm looking for something.

This blog is my creative outlet. As a creative person, choosing to pursue a law degree might have been a stupid move - I haven't read a fiction book for my own enjoyment in over a year now. There's no scope for creative writing in our essays, or free thinking in an exam scenario. The stifling of creativity is suffocating and I'm now, at long last, able to breathe some life back into myself, and recapture what's left of my personality after the trauma of a commercial law exam.

But there's a lesson that's came from all of this, and it's that creativity can come in the smallest parts of your every day life. It's in making your dinner, it's in making a playlist that will help you enjoy a boring task, it's searching out NEW music and developing your tastes, it's using different coloured pens, it's going for a walk in the morning, it's choosing to shake up your gym routine if you have one, it's choosing to walk to work, it's telling people stories and listening to others, it's positivity and it's teaching yourself to open your mind to comfortably acknowledge and accept differing opinions - regardless of how you might personally feel about something.

Keeping an open mind, about everything, being non-judgemental, and actively looking for fresh ideas is what keeps me going. Seeking out opportunities for personal growth, and reflecting on my attitudes and emotions in different scenarios over the past year in particular has been one of the most rewarding things that I've could have done for myself. Change takes time, whether it's gradual, or whether it hits you immediately, and is beneficial not just for you, but for other people around you - it shapes how you handle your emotions and ultimately helps you become a most considerate and supportive person. Change is arguably the most important form of creativity, and creativity is driven by positivity (and maybe vice versa).

At a more superficial level, creativity also comes in the form of new experiences and the development of different projects, whether it's a painting or creating an outfit for an upcoming Taylor Swift concert (lol). This summer I'm placing a focus on that, I want to paint, bake, write, run, listen, read, and see and do things that I've either been putting off or never thought about doing in the first place. I'm travelling as much as time and money can afford (including going back to DISNEY!!!!!!!), going to concerts, road trips, cutting and highlighting my hair, getting my ears pierced (if I can pluck up the courage), listening to new albums (to me personally - whether released yesterday or 30 years ago), supporting friend's projects, meeting new people, and I'm entering my 20's.

This summer will be wonderful, because I'm going to make it wonderful. I know that live can change in an instant, for better or worse, but regardless I want to take every step with a positive outlook, a clear mind and a smile on my face. :-)